Tau Halftime Report, From AD

DeletedUser2770

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---Tau WW Half Time Report---

Simmers of Tau (anyone that is not Team Bad Guys of course),

Team Bad Guys are about halfway through our wonders and we thought it appropriate to update you all on what is going on and what will happen in the second half of WW. Now, we have already started to receive letters from some people in the other alliances that want to join the winning team. We are always open to active and aggressive players but you must prove yourself first. An act to prove you're serious would be needed. Now, on to the news from the front..

First, TBD fumbled the football when its Founder accidentally kicked a player that was in vaca mode and on 5 ww islands. TBD better pick up its passing game if it wants to catch up and carry out the UN's plan. Yes, the UN. Read on.

Second, C-Holes were favored as the runner up: they are ranked second in points, and concentrated on only 5 wonders. Yet, they are still lagging behind. C-Holes have turned out to be a big bomb and disappointment. But the entity that is now called C-Holes has a history of a horrible coaching staff, whether they were SKS, Harbingers, or now C-Holes. Embarrassing.

Third, the Feds have been trying hard, buying up all the draft picks that no other alliance would take. They now have an army of worker ants to help them. But even with their army of drones helping them, they are behind us. The ant hills must have been made a little shoddy. But we do enjoy stepping on ant hills.

Fourth, the best thing ever is about to happen: The UN is reforming and will be led by the new witchqueen, Senator Palpatine. You have no idea how happy this makes us, as my crew is getting bored clicking, clicking, and more clicking for sending resources (but our fingers move fast, just ask the ladies on Team Bad Guys). But watch out Senator, you have some big shoes to fill from witchqueen and I don't know if it is fitting for a Senator to wear a cape.
Now here is the UN's plan: Three alliances will concentrate on 2 Wonders each in an attempt to prevent Team Bad Guys from getting any wonders.

Fifth, the UN is founding cities next to our wonder islands. I have to say, nothing makes us happier than to kill 75 Pegs and lose only 800 slingers doing it. Keep it up. Please continue to found 1k point cities and use your resources building them.

Now as for the "2 Wonders each plan", the UN has always and will always refuse to address the issue of what happens if they succeed in their plan: that they will then have to fight each other. Now if the Feds build 2, C-Holes build 2, and TBD builds 2, what happens? The three of you will go to each others oceans to get 2 more? Oh my, three simming alliances trying to penetrate each others oceans to knock down 2 wonders each. This will take two years. And in that time, Team Bad Guys would simply knock down 4 wonder from whomever we choose. But this is all theoretical.. my crew is on a diet of 5-hour energy drinks taken every 3 hours, we do not sleep. We only win. We will still be the first to build 4 wonders even with your feeble plan in place. And you can count on that.

Now let's kick it off for the second half of WW, with the new and improved UN.
But I regret to inform you that a giant group of mediocre players cannot beat a smaller group of all-stars. Sorry Senator. I'll see you on your wonder island (if you can build one, which it doesn't look like).

- AD and his Bad Guys

P.S. send all hate mail to PTW
 
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