Jeb's School for Scoundrels

DeletedUser5517

Guest
Welcome back to class folks. Those of you that tuned in the last time will know what this is, but those of you that didn't should probably pay attention. Every world that I come into there are always countless feeble noobs that need a little coaching so that I can actually have some fun. (Nobody decent likes an easy target... up your game) This is how i do that without going insane ;). Normally, I would ridicule one of these insignificant whelps in one of my wonderful displays of PNP, but this time I get a rare treat. Miss Dwarrel came to play!!!!! Soooooooo.... this first post will be a little different, but lets get this started.

First off, CONGRATULATIONS!!!! You are the first and only player ever to take one of my cities. Kudos! That being said... DEAR LORD WOMAN IT TOOK YOU A WHOLE WORLD OF PLAYERS TO DO IT!!! But dont worry hun, I'll show you how to do it all by yo little old sewf next time ;). First and foremost, your strategy was deplorable. The entire world tried to revolt over 50 cities in a day. I know... this sounds great... but only 4 in revolt? If you don't consider that a failure i dont know what is and this guide is not going to help you, but if you would like to learn here's a little taste:

THE EPIC OF JEB'S ONLY LOST CITY: Jebs side Taken by: Dwarrel - Jaguar Warriors - Knossos - en

All those little tykes sending all those un-timed attacks,
with all their prayers Jeb's offense, was not at their backs,
battalion after battalion came to knock.
Oh my god!!! Over half of 'em died in the dock,

When the first wave concludes and all the smoke clears,
the only words you could muster were, "JUST LOOK AT THOSE BIRS!!!!
It's ok guys you don't need to fear.
Four big whole revolts, he's not in the clear." ;)

"Our tactic is working lets keep trying the same,
but lets get some spy reports and change the game!
One million, two million... We must be close?"
"10 million in savings and HE didn't boast?"

You look once more and realize you're still blind.
Never realized one player could put the world in a bind.
10 million gone and now you can see,
There is no way, just you, could take, lil 'ol me.

Pop growth, pop growth, call of the ocean;
you better do something to get those troops into motion.
You're going to Jeb's casa, and he don't use ANY lotion.

"It's so exciting, red revolt's almost here!"
"Do we have enough LS, to clear, all those bir?"
"Hell NO we don't! Lets see who's see who's around.
Lets get the academies and Valor to sound."

4500 arrows, all at one shot!
Look at how many cities that world wide op got.
With all that effort I'm glad you got paid.
... But to get only one city and attack for 2 days?

Cs after cs sunk in the sea,
My sniping skills are legendary.
Loosing 5 or 10 may not be excessive,
but even you cant deny, 25 down... that's a little impressive.

Now that the story, has begun to ebb,
the time has come for lessons to be uncovered.
You can't overestimate the one and only Jeb...
You are going, to get smothered.

P.S. Miss Dwarrel- the poem was done in true papa bear style just for you ;)
 
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dwarrel

Messenger
Awwwhhhh the one and only jeb has a lil crush on me.....
Sorry jeb, you might call yourself mighty but this should be called the EPIC failure to PnP as everyone can see it is a love poem!
So many words but so lil substance... its a shame really, you had so much potential but you write poems like you play grepo. Overconfident, pompous, and lacking style ;)
 

DeletedUser5517

Guest
Awwwhhhh the one and only jeb has a lil crush on me.....
Sorry jeb, you might call yourself mighty but this should be called the EPIC failure to PnP as everyone can see it is a love poem!
So many words but so lil substance... its a shame really, you had so much potential but you write poems like you play grepo. Overconfident, pompous, and lacking style ;)
Hey hey hey. Overconfident, meh its possible. Pompous, probably. But lacking in style? Lets see what you got little lady. I know its better than this.
 
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dwarrel

Messenger
Fine fine, ill lower myself to your lvl and poem it up :D

Sorry baby Jebby,
you might think you're migh-tee,
but this is THE epic failure of... PNP!
P.S. I think somebody's got a crush on me...

So many words, but so little substance,
Its really shame, I thought you above this.
Was excited for this world but now its clear,
You have only 3 cities and you think you will beat beer?

All that potential, but now I can see,
it's so sad; you could never play grep as good as me.
Sniping skills? Legendary?
You can't even snipe, one CS from me!

10 min farms, oh Jebby you know it.
My troops are lightning, ready... Dont blow it!
All that defense gives me tons of BP.
Ill take that all day, thanks for the city!

However i did like your retaliation,
planning havoc and devastation.
only to look through your reports with a heavy sigh,
seeing biremes in my harbors pilled up high!

blindly you hit the attack buttons,
being one of the biggest bp gluttons!
but only a mere transportship returned,
OMG jebby got burned!

a thought arose from within deep,
weeks after crying yourself to sleep;
i might be the mighty jebby,
but miss Dwarrel is way better than me!
 
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DeletedUser5517

Guest
Oh little dwarrel,
we'll get to quarrel.
Do you really think you can win,
in this game of deadly sins?

THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!!! Miss Dwarrel! Had to give some more kudos for that reply before I got started.

Now that all that poetry is done we can get back to the usual lessons...

Dear Lord! I found my first noob. Fortunately for me, he thinks he is good because he is in the top MRA... and happens to be the #8 attacker... That's right its you scots dg. It's sad for him though all that cockiness and not a single good alliance taken out yet. I know that competence breeds confidence, but when you are a noob and take out the noob next to you it doesn't make you good. This fine gentlemen tried to get a little feisty with me when I was gifted a city on what he thought was his island [island]180278[/island]. ( If you look at that island and cant see why he is a noob... pretty please, with cherries on top, leave this world now so i don't have to waste my time rimming you.) Here is what followed:

SCOTS DG on 2017-01-23 at 16:38
just let those ships die and we will leave it at that. the last thing you want is us calling an OP on you. the last people we did that to they quit :)

ROFL!!! So of course I replied in the usual Jeb style...

Jebusius on 2017-01-23 at 16:44
HAHAHAHAHA! Small child... you have no idea. Save this message. Just remember how cocky you though you were and how good your alliance was.

The one and only,
Jeb

This was right when I conquered the city...

And now that I'm ready to go...

[report]c60e9f2dfb0f09fdcc881e45e950107a[/report]

[report]e823179c012f9b6d16a5e52e36fe6a36[/report]

[report]bcc47764e3269ae68e8c9b2e71e25a06[/report]

ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

I even tried to give him fair warning I swear

Jebusius on 2017-01-23 at 19:03
You may want to ask some of your buddies about me
They can let you know what you are in for LOL

Not only did this poor noob not take my warning... HE DIDNT EVEN HAVE WALLS LOLOLOLOLOL!!!! So today's first lesson is this. Don't try and talk trash to Jeb... He is better than you, but if you do... BUILD YOUR WALLL or be embarrassed!!!

I also sent him this little hello ;). He hasn't replied, it's hard to reply when a player with 3 cities is ruining your evening...

Jebusius today at 19:20
Hey sweety!!! How are you on this fine winter day?

Happy Hunting... and tune in soon for some more of Jeb's wonderful lessons
 

DeletedUser9276

Guest
Wheres the follow up to this Jeb? You revolted the city, but where is the city take? Come on tough guy, lets see it.

LOL at bragging about your alliance stacking the crap out of your city. I am sure if we had two safe oceans and weren't really fighting anyone else we could load up frontline cities like that as well
 

DeletedUser5517

Guest
Wheres the follow up to this Jeb? You revolted the city, but where is the city take? Come on tough guy, lets see it.

LOL at bragging about your alliance stacking the crap out of your city. I am sure if we had two safe oceans and weren't really fighting anyone else we could load up frontline cities like that as well
My good man,

Does your ignorance know no bounds? Or, is it simply that you think your alliance is THAT terrible and have come to the same realization as the rest of us? If you think that a player with 3 cities could take a city off of one of your top players with 5 cities on that island, then you have about as much respect for your alliance as the rest of us... Welcome to the club buddy! Its better here in reality ;).

People just dont read the damn lessons. THERE WERE ONLY 2!!!

Owned yet again by...
The one and only
Jeb
 
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DeletedUser9276

Guest
Oh, but you think you tough and good for simply revolting his city? Got it.

If we are so bad come take some cities off us mate. There is a reason we have over 4x the ABP of the next alliance. Until then keep yapping on the forums.
 

DeletedUser5517

Guest
Oh, but you think you tough and good for simply revolting his city? Got it.

If we are so bad come take some cities off us mate. There is a reason we have over 4x the ABP of the next alliance. Until then keep yapping on the forums.
I remember when I was 3 and all I could do was cry in my crib when i wasnt getting my way. Do you see how pathetic and weak that looks? Even you know you are a MRA and that is why you are trying to defend your alliance. You realize your best player, who has over double the bp of the next best attacker in the world... is on VM and is not returning. So are 4 of your other large attackers. God I cant wait to eat their cities so i can have a lil ol base right next to you ;)

And yes that reason is I wasnt here slapping you around... If I can revolt 3 of your cities from one of mine and was doing that from the world's start do you really think you could compete? I have played with and against you and every time... your lack of intelligence and composure are your downfall. Sorry buddy, but in the fine words of Ron White- "You can't fix stupid!"

...owned again? Care for round 3?
 
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DeletedUser9276

Guest
I remember when I was 3 and all I could do was cry in my crib when i wasnt getting my way.

And yes that reason is I wasnt here slapping you around... If I can revolt 3 of your cities from one of mine and was doing that from the world's start do you really think you could compete? I have played with and against you and every time... your lack of intelligence and composure are your downfall. Sorry buddy, but in the fine words of Ron White- "You can't fix stupid!"
You have not played with me or against me.

Good try though. Continue on with your fantasy of if you were here we wouldn't be where we are. Its what alot of the rest have thought as well.
 

DeletedUser5517

Guest
You have not played with me or against me.

Good try though. Continue on with your fantasy of if you were here we wouldn't be where we are. Its what alot of the rest have thought as well.
Haha! you are right... that is what most people think. I'm going to show you. We can agree that you are the obvious choice for any onlooker to win. So when we slap the hell out of you, there will be no doubt that we are better than you.
 

DeletedUser9276

Guest
Yes Yes carry on with your little facade. I usaully speak very highly of Rim Rats, I guess there is always one village idiot in the group though.

Mercy and others I have spoken with are all good people though.
 

DeletedUser5517

Guest
Yes Yes carry on with your little facade. I usaully speak very highly of Rim Rats, I guess there is always one village idiot in the group though.

Mercy and others I have spoken with are all good people though.
So thats your MO? Start talking trash and then get beat so you quit and try to retreat? Its ok playing the victim is usually what the loosers do best ;)

You realize you just admitted to being owned by our village idiot.. So Beer's founder is dumber than our village idiot? Stop making this so easy
 
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Mac Bolan

Peltast
So thats your MO? Start talking trash and then get beat so you quit and try to retreat? Its ok playing the victim is usually what the loosers do best ;)

You realize you just admitted to being owned by our village idiot.. So Beer's founder is dumber than our village idiot? Stop making this so easy
And Jeb you just admitted to being the "Idiot" Don't worry I am sure someone will give you a hug. Maybe set up a safe space with some hot cocoa and cookies.